Learning to Depend on God
For the past couple of years, Wilda and I had tightened our belts and cut down on our budget, realizing a reduced income. We knew that shortly we would be subsisting on the time worn, 'fixed income." Now that we have transisted, and are on our own in Springfield, MO, we are relying upon the Lord who is and will supply all our needs in Christ Jesus. Any publication of or whining with the burdens, only brings the human response, 'Why didn't you provide more amply for that time?' This is why I do not and will not appeal to my peers and contemporaries, for I do not feel worthy to approach these difficult subjects. It is my bed and I made it. However, it is acceptable and valuable to re-affirm my full faith in a living God, who has made a lot of promises to those of us who find ourselves in complete dependence upon Him.
Though I am 75 and about to turn 76, I am in good health. I still have the same heart I had 58 years ago, when I gave my life and will to the Lord Jesus Christ. 50 years ago, I placed my life and the lives of my family in the hands of the Lord for his safekeeping and provisions. I had an over riding dread of approaching churches to support us in Ethiopia but was corrected by a man of God who told me that my travelling and presenting my call was an invitation to others to go with me to the uttermost part of the world in answer to the great commission. Their support was their obedience to that call. That made it a little easier to ask for that support for the lost in Ethiopia. My wife will testify that I was greatly relieved when we resigned in 1974 as missionaries and no longer had to 'beg' for support. I never requested support from humans for the beginning of the church in Connecticut. Some wonderful humans helped us in spite of no requests.
God does make it clear, that he has no obligation to provide for someone who will not do what they can to provide for themselves. He refers to them as worse than infidels. On the other hand the scripture is replete with warnings and illustrations about those who put more emphasis upon material things rather than spiritual things. I think the individual's individual philosophy and conviction is the determining factor as to where he will place his priorities. The key word is, 'needs.' God promises to supply our needs. Not our wants. Our needs. One only need read his Bible to find many examples and truths concerning the Lord's willingness to provide for his own, especially, those who depend upon Him. Have you ever considered the physical necessity of around 2 million people wandering through a barren wilderness for 40 years. God provided amply for them daily. Obviously it was plenty for they only griped that they had no leeks and garlic.
I am not ready to rock away the rest of my years in a rocking chair, but am ready to go where he leads and do what ever I am called to do. I do not plan to try to do what I believe the Lord wants to do nor will I expect the Lord to do what he expects me to do. It is a fine line and others may make unfair judgments, but I trust the Lord and He has never failed me.